Other people's opinions
Other people's opinions of me shouldn't matter. To me, anyway.
It took me awhile to learn this. A long while. But the better I became at living by this guideline, the better the living.
I need to qualify the word matter. I mean to be something that affects me emotionally, that I have a gut reaction to, one that could be at odds with reality, the actual situation.
Other people's opinions of me can be valuable. They might be accurate, and I can learn something about myself from them. They might not be accurate, but they might be a reasonable interpretation of how I appear, and I can learn something about how I am (badly) presenting myself to the world. They might be an unreasonable interpretation, and I can learn something about the person who is being unreasonable.
In the process I might learn that I am less than the person I want to be. I should be grateful for that, and do what I can to close the gap. Why wouldn't I?
But in all three cases I shouldn't take those opinions to heart. I should instead craft my own opinion of what kind of person I am, and stand by that opinion. After all, who is in a better position to do the crafting?